Judge Compares Snooki’s Antics to Those of Lindsay Lohan

Nicole “Snooki” Polizzi was in a New Jersey court to account for her drunk and disorderly conduct stemming from her July arrest. She was fined $500 and ordered to perform community service. The best part was the comments from the judge presiding over the case. He said of her antics: “Rude, profane, obnoxious and self-indulgent is not the way to live your life. If this was your idea of a good time, it appears your recent celebrity has affected your judgment.” He went on to call her a “Lindsay Lohan wannabe.” I like this judge!

Video: Snookie Talks About her “Jail Time”

Lindsay Lohan Avoids Jail By Posting Bail, Knocks Back Some Wine on Flight Home

WTF is up with this whole story? Lindsay Lohan misses her court date because she is partying it up in France during the Cannes Film Festival. She claims to have lost her passport but can’t explain why she didn’t finish her court appointed drug and alcohol classes. So, the judge issues warrant for her arrest. But, of course Lohan sideswipes that order by posting $100,000 bail, thus avoiding (what I was hoping) images of police arresting her as she descends the plane. So, what does she do on the flight from France to London? She kicks back and drinks some wine! Are you fucking serious? Glad we are so forgiving of a cracked out whore who literally throws money at the law in order to avoid responsibility.

Lindsay Lohan Drunk at Canes? What??

Say it ain’t so! Lindsay Lohan was drunk? At Cannes? The judge presiding over her infractions was very clear that she must finish her traffic school obligations by this Thursday or she is going to jail. Well, have no fear….she only has 13 more to go. She did an interview in the recent past where she said she has no issues with drugs and alcohol yet every time we see her, she is shit faced and falling down. Well,, I’ll be counting the days until Thursday and hoping to report back to all of you that the friggin nut is in jail!

Katie Price Drunk - Again

Katie Price was out in London last night, and surprise…surprise, bitch got boozed up AGAIN.

Part of me thinks that this trick is just pretending to be drunk so she gets more attention. We’ve all known hos like that. Bitches who gargle with Listerine and then say, “Ooooh, I’m buzzing it!” Or they take a sip of Gatorade and warn you that they might start doing some “out of control” shit. You know you’re going to be spending the rest of the night rolling your eyes at their pretend stumbles and faux slurring.

I hope Katie is paying for her friend’s booze tabs, because they got all fancied up and had to spend their night carrying her drunk (authentic or fake) ass around. They probably got Katie’s tan diarrhea all over their fancy jackets.

DLISTED

The Hoff is Hospitalized - Again

TROUBLED actor DAVID HASSELHOFF was admitted to hospital on Friday after suffering a seizure, according to reports.

Gossip website RadarOnline.com claims the Baywatch star’s daughter, HAYLEY, called emergency services when her father fell ill.

The actor was reportedly rushed to Los Angeles’ Cedars-Sinai Medical Center by ambulance for treatment.

Hoff’ss neighbour, named only as Christian, tells the website: “I asked one of the paramedics how David was doing and he told me his eyes were rolling back into his head, he was drooling and that he’d had a seizure.

“This isn’t the first time this has happened to him.”

A spokesperson for the L.A. City Fire Department confirms: “Paramedics were called to (a house) in Encino for medical aid. Paramedics arrived at approximately 11:51 am and later transported the patient a nearby hospital.”

The 57 year old, who has a long history of alcoholism, had allegedly been drinking in the past two days and saw one of his personal doctors on Wednesday (25Nov09) after returning from a trip to Canada.

The Knight Rider star was admitted to rehab in October amid reports he accidentally hit a doctor during a booze binge.

He has also been hospitalized on two separate occasions this year, reportedly suffering from alcohol poisoning.

The Sun

David Hasselhoff fell off his wagon - again!

David Hasselhoff is back in the hospital. Reason: too much booze.

According to RadarOnline.com, paramedics were called to the former Baywatch star’s home in Encino, Calif., on Sunday.

The America’s Got Talent judge — who often appears loopy on the hit reality series — recently wrapped taping and allegedly began tying one on to celebrate. The Hoff’s poison: vodka.

The 57-year-old actor, an admitted “recovering alcoholic,” was at home with his 17-year-old daughter Hayley, who called 911. She was the one who shot the sad video of her father drunkenly eating a hamburger on the floor in 2007.

“You need to promise me you’re not going to drink alcohol tonight,” she said in the shot, which was a wakeup call for Hasselhoff, or so he said at the time.

The hospitalization is the second one in five months.

MIAMI HERALD