Why it Pays to be a Hooker in Hollywood

Devine Brown (yes, I’m surprised we’re still talking about her too) has released a statement today about the night that made her famous. She states,

“Everything turned out for the better. I love Hugh Grant. Hugh Grant put my kids through school, gave us a chance of the life we probably would’ve never reached. We had a chance to travel on private jets.”

Well now this is just going to make it that much harder for famous people to have sex with prostitutes in private. Before you even have a chance feel ashamed about what just happened, she’ll be on the phone with her agent setting up an interview with Barbara Walters. Unless you kill them right after, of course. But I would never condone that kind of behavior. I swear that time in Vegas was a total accident. She smothered HERSELF with the pillow!! How many times do I have to tell you that?!

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